Friday, September 9, 2011


I saw a portion of a video this week and I wanted to make it available to you.  Below is a Frontline PBS video about the 10 year anniversary of 9/11.  As readers will recall I was an analyst and trader at the time that the towers were attacked.  I did not live in New York at the time so I was not in physical danger (that we knew of), but I am quite moved still at these scenes and as humans we always tend to place ourselves in a situation and view things through the lens of "that could have been me". 

I know many traders and brokers in New York and Chicago that lost close fellow employees and friends and somehow they continued to work and survive.  I am very patriotic and love my country, but I hate how politicians and the media have hijacked this event and am turned off every time I hear how we were attacked, but we won.  No one in the US won, and I refuse to try to make myself feel better because we invaded a country full of poppies and killed thousands of men that think they are attacking us for their own good reasons.

I am very emotional today as I rewatch this video and see the images of men and women throwing themselves from windows above the impact areas in the buildings.  I cannot imagine the fear and utter despair that caused those actions.

I don't know how I feel about this video as it shows so many men and women who are survivors of victims of 9/11.  The perspective in the video is that many have lost faith in God and I would even say have a hate for Him.  I cannot sit in judgement of them nor can I understand their loss and pain.  I can say that I am troubled by so many of their comments and beliefs 10 years later.  I have to remind myself that PBS is probably delighted to show a God-less and God-hating perspective since many very liberal perspectives agree with that.  No matter what their ultimate agenda in showing the film, I want to share it.

Without doing much more writing I want to state emphatically something that we all need to understand as we watch these people grapple with their faith and core beliefs about God.  I continued to hear in the documentary that many of the people had perfect lives, were blessed, and felt very close to their Lord.  However, now that they have suffered a loss they feel abandoned and are wrestling with how God could allow these terrible things to happen to them.  I believe and know that many of their feelings of loss and God's betrayal stem from a misunderstanding of who we are and why we are here.  The bible and Jewish texts tells us that we are created to worship Him and serve Him, it never promises a perfect life without sadness or loss.  I hear the pain of many in the videos and they are angry and pained but suddenly attribute it all to Him.  I sense that they had a deal with God that they made up, "God you give me everything I want and I'll follow you".  I don't think this is the vision and the covenant that God has in mind for any of us.  In fact, God says, "Give up everything and this will demonstrate your love".

Giving up everything is hard and I can't begin to say that I am at that place of achieving it.  I hate that these people lost so much and it pains me deeply to see that they have lost their loved ones AND their faith and confidence in the one true person of God that can heal and restore them in that place of sorrow.  In that sense, perhaps evil did win that day in that it revealed the deceptions of our hearts in 9/11, that we felt that God was here to serve us and when that wasn't true we rejected Him and sought to blame Him for our wrongly formed and unmet expectations.

  (This embedded video is part 1/7, as they finish you can go to the next one.  This is helpful because you can watch the video as you have time.  I've put the link to the original video at PBS below, if you have time you can watch it all there without seeking for the next chapter.)

Watch the full episode. See more FRONTLINE.

I posted this commentary with the intent of sharing my feelings and thoughts that provoke me to tears.  I do not mean to offend anyone that suffered a loss, I truly cry and share anguish with you although I cannot imagine the sorrow you must endure.  With this loss though, it is imperative to have a true foundation of where we sit in relation to our Lord, without it we will be consistently disappointed and our wrong view will ultimately damage our eternal salvation.


Goatmug is an investor that cares about you and your family. Goatmug's Blog - Financial Perspectives From The Mountain Top is a collection of thoughts on our economy and how it impacts the lives of investors and average people. While several specific investments are named in many of his posts, these articles are simply invitations for you to do your own research and reference to these securities does not constitute financial advice. Your situation is complex and unique and you should seek professional assistance with your trading and investing. Please visit Goatmug and share your comments at